Friday, August 10, 2007

Back in the Saddle!

Hey, remember Miss Universegate? To recap briefly: Miss USA, aspiring local-news anchorwoman Rachel Smith, kissed the stage with her (it must be said) perfectly-proportioned kiester, at which point the Mexican audience burst into feverish booing. Why? It was either because: (A) Walking across a stage dressed as a $1,000-a-night hooker without falling flat on your ass is literally all you have to do to win Miss Universe! Seriously, there isn't even one of those baton-twirling "talent" portions! Or, (B) Spics hate America. Not surprisingly, (B) had a lot more traction.

Now, it seems, Mexico has dropped to its knees and begged forgiveness at the highest levels. Specifically, the chief of staff of Mexico's tourism department, at the behest of the guy who runs the Mexican Consulate in Los Angeles, who had received a complaint from an advocate for homeless people (stick with us here), sent a letter to a different California homeless advocate expressing his regret that a "small group" of people heckled the beauty pageant's fourth-runner up. That guy totally promises to forward the letter to Smith. Or perhaps deliver it in person, over a romantic dinner for two at Chilis.

Meanwhile, I'd like to issue an apology, on behalf of the United States of America, for this. I'm not really authorized, I'm just sorta freelancing this one, like Jesse Jackson sometimes does.

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