Friday, May 02, 2008

Gangster's Paradise

Ah, Swampscott! The kind of quiet, peaceful town where the local paper devotes half a page to chronicling a native's "homecoming"...from the neighboring town. Where the top item on the Town Meeting agenda is snow removal. A town that has proudly won the designation "Tree City" 17 years in a row. Why anyone would leave such an idyllic paradise for for the lawless frontier of Mexico, I just can't say. You'd have to be crazy.

So, in other Swampscott news, a 13-year-old boy was hospitalized when the homemade IED he was building blew up in his face, a knife-wielding cocaine trafficker has been taken into custody, and animal control officers are debating the best way to handle the town's recent coyote infestation.

The plane leaves in 27 hours...


Anonymous said...

OK. We did have a LOT of snow, and we do have a lot of trees. The cocaine trafficker was just passing through. The kid with the bomb was probably just doing a science experiment. And, as far as the coyote's go, we saw a pack of four in the backyard, all howling! It was wonderful!
But, knowing the mentality of most people, they will find some way to kill them.

Why would you leave all this for sunny, warm Mexico???


Burro Hall said...

Duh! For the underage sex slaves, obviously.

Anonymous said...

I should have known!!

Safe trip home.