Thursday, June 12, 2008

How to Write an Unforgettable Cover Letter

The LA Times reminds us today that sometimes, a spray-painted bedsheet just isn't eye-catching enough:

In case decapitating their victims and dumping the heads in picnic coolers didn't make the point, the killers left a note.

"This is a warning," it said, listing an alphabet soup of Mexican police agencies and the noms de guerre of several well-known drug figures. "You get what you deserve."...

The same day, police in neighboring Chihuahua state came upon five swaddled bodies accompanied by a hand- lettered placard.

"This is what happens to stupid traitors who take sides with Chapo Guzman," said the message found in Ciudad Juarez, referring to Joaquin "Shorty" Guzman, the supposed leader of the main drug gang in adjacent Sinaloa state.

But of course, this is Mexico, where formality and good manners are the order of the day:

The killers closed with incongruous propriety: "Yours truly," they signed off, "La Linea."


Fuckin' Mex Files said...

Wow, you really are uptight there in Queterero. When the Governor of Jalisco called constituents who complained about his "donations" of state funds to the Church a bunch of motherfuckers, he was quoted in full in the national papers and up here in Sinaloa.

Maybe you just have prissy narcos. And then again, motherfucking presumably is male-female sex, whereas assfuckers are... you know... kinda gay.

Burro Hall said...

I think it's just that we prefer the more elegant-sounding culero when we need to call someone an assfucker. (Surprisingly often, these days.)

Anonymous said...

On a related (if only vaguely) note it appears that a son of Chapo Guzmán is living in Querétaro - at least according to the police. A week ago Club Mulatta was "stormed" by the AFI, Federales, State troopers etc. in the hope of finding someone trying to get free drinks by name-dropping but they exited empty-handed. Nice shiny machine guns though...

Burro Hall said...

Wow, that's really embarrassing. I've been dropping Chapo's name for two years now. I must've just left Club Mulata right before AFI arrived.

My bad.