Monday, March 23, 2009

The Five Scariest Words in Journalism

"First article in a series."

Since officials here formed a special squad last year to deal with home invasions, they have counted more than 200 of them, with more than three-quarters linked to the drug trade. In one case, the intruders burst into the wrong house, shooting and injuring a woman watching television on her couch. In another, in a nearby suburb, a man the police described as a drug dealer was taken from his home at gunpoint and is still missing.

...Although overall violent crime has dropped in several cities on or near the border — Tucson is an exception, reporting a rise in homicides and other serious crime last year — Arizona appears to be bearing the brunt of smuggling-related violence. Some 60 percent of illicit drugs found in the United States — principally cocaine, marijuana and methamphetamine — entered through the border in this state.

That's the New York Times reporting from the failed state of Arizona, where residents of the state buy a lot of guns, buy a lot of drugs, sell a lot of drugs, take a lot of drugs, and commit crimes violent crimes against each other. So the article is, of course, titled Mexican Drug Cartel Violence Spills Over, Alarming U.S. Poor America. So far from God, so close to Mexico!

At some point the US is going to have to step up and take ownership of this problem, which stems from the country's insatiable demand for narcotics, but until then we can look forward to more articles like this one, which kind of remind us of those "vintage" illustrations from The Onion in which some foreign invader is always raping Lady Liberty. At least from the headline, the article seems to imply that violent Mexicans are threatening innocent Americans, though the piece itself doesn't implicate any actual Mexicans. And with the exception of the female victim of mistaken identity mentioned above, every other victim in the story is believed to have had some connection to the drug trade - kinda the way it is in Mexico, except no one's trying to destroy Arizona's tourism industry because a bunch of drug dealers are shooting each other.

(Ironically, given our recent focus here on Spring Break, the only time we went away for Spring Break in college was to visit friends at Arizona State. But that was back in '88, before Arizona collapsed into lawlessness. Back then, you could walk down the streets of Phoenix without fear of being beheaded. Don't look at us like that, young'uns...it's true!)

American street dealers shooting each other with American guns over American dollars earned from selling drugs to American addicts. Fuckin' Mexicans...

10 comments:

Anonymous said...

So border fence is the answer, right?

Burro Hall said...

Depends. If Arizona's violence spills over into Mexico, it might be worth considering.

Anonymous said...

That's what I'm saying... especially considering your unwillingness to take ownership of Mexico's insatiable demand for guns.
You know what they say: Good fences, make for good neighbors!

Burro Hall said...

"Mexico's insatiable demand for guns." Zing! That's a good one. Like saying "New York's insatiable demand for terrorist attacks." Anyway, the problem with a border fence is that it would inhibit (ever so slightly) America's insatiable demand for undocumented migrant workers, particularly among companies specializing in border fences. In these tough economic times, can we really afford that?

Anonymous said...

Or even "The U.S's insatiable demand for illegal drugs"

Burro Hall said...

Exactly. Build that fence, and where you gonna buy your eight-ball?

Anonymous said...

I don't think it was quite like saying "New York's insatiable demand for terrorist attacks."

Godwin's Law, anyone?

Burro Hall said...

Oh, so now you're saying I'm worse than Hitler?

Anonymous said...

LOL. You win.

Burro Hall said...

Ahem.