Wednesday, July 01, 2009

The Surge Worked

As if Mexico hasn't had enough bad news this year, they country suffered a stunning setback today in its quest to unseat the United States as the Fattest Nation on the Face of God's Green Earth. Turns out obesity in the Unites States isn't just increasing, it's "surging!"

Obesity rates in the US have surged over the last year, a report shows.

The Trust for America's Health (TFAH) and the Robert Wood Johnson Foundation found adult obesity rates rose in 23 of the 50 states, but fell in none.

In addition, the percentage of obese and overweight children is at or above 30% in 30 states.

Thirty percent in 30 states! And this report was released before the summer ice-cream-and-video-games season even began. President Obama may want to challenge the nation: 50% in 50 States by 2050. What's that? Too great a challenge, you say? America's not up to task? I'm sorry, but could you speak up a little? Neil Armstrong can't hear you...because he's standing on the fucking moon right now.

"Our health care costs have grown along with our waist lines," says Dr. Jeff Levi, the author of the report and a man whose patriotism, we believe, is deeply suspect. "How are we going to compete with the rest of the world if our economy and workforce are weighed down by bad health?"

How are we going to compete? Hey, "doctor," why don't you ask Mexico how we're competing?

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

Judging by the picture, Frank, you really have to cut down on the burritos.