Friday, November 06, 2009

The Fresh Prince

The Dutch royal family - whose existence we were unaware of until today - is on a state visit to Mexico at the moment, during which the crown prince (seriously? There's a crown prince of the Netherlands?), gave a speech on global warming. Mexico pollutes a lot and Holland flood a lot, and Mexicans are a tad on the sensitive side, so of all the possible approaches the kroonprins could have taken, telling the audience to go fuck themselves strikes us as the most reckless.

The crown prince who was urging his listeners to act against global warming was giving a speech in English when he used the Spanish expression, "camarón que se duerme, se lo lleva al corriente", (a sleeping shrimp will be washed away by the tide).

Instead of saying al corriente, Willem-Alexander said "a la chingada".

This is the kind of mistake we live in mortal fear of making. (We're still reeling from the time was asked a guy about his grandmother's rectum, rather than recipe.) We're so squeamish about stuff like this that, to be honest, we would have steered clear of comparing our audience to sleeping shrimps. ("Who you calling short and lazy, pendejo?") But Mexicans are a kind-hearted people, and so they "burst into laughter," which we assume was affectionate. But they also hold a grudge, dear Crown Prince, and by now they've certainly discovered that 60 percent of the Dutch population resides below sea level, and are increasing their carbon emissions accordingly. You may want to keep the royal yacht fully stocked from now on.


Mexfiles said...

Not only is there a crown prince, the Crown Princess is a Latin American. Of course, her Spanish is probably even more offensive to Mexican ears, being an Argentine.

Burro Hall said...

She's offensive to Dutch ears, too, apparently. Her dad was a secretary in Videla's cabinet. The only way the wedding was allowed to go forward was if he stayed home.

I bet she set him up.

Anonymous said...

I think it was a great idea and that was planned, it gave the speech more space in the media, so the urgent idea is reaching everybody.