Friday, May 28, 2010

¡Qué Barbary!

In case your list of Horrifying Mexican Threats to American Safety and Security is in need of updating:

Armed Mexican Pirates Terrorize Texas Lake: U.S. Boaters at Popular Falcon Lake Fear for Their Lives

Mexican drug cartel pirates have made their debut on Falcon Lake in Zapata County, Texas.

Texans have reported seeing armed boatmen on the lake, which hosts some of the largest bass fishing tournaments in the U.S. and shares a border with the northern Mexican state of Tamaulipas. Not unlike the infamous Somali pirates in the Gulf of Aden, pirates on this lake have reportedly wielded high-powered rifles and automatic weapons.

After several incidents in the past month, including armed robbery and attempted armed robbery, the Texas Department of Public Safety and the Zapata County Sheriff's Department are urging all boaters to stay out of Mexican waters. (The international border is in the middle of the lake.)

"It's piracy," said Zapata County Sheriff Sigifredo Gonzalez. "It may not be on the high seas, but they are taking advantage of people on this lake by threatening and robbing them."

The upside, of course, is that televised bass fishing just got way more exciting.


Anonymous said...

Fish while you still can as the oil slick will kill all bass.

Anonymous said...

This is their April 1st edition, right?

Burro Hall said...

If the oil slick crawls all the way up the Rio Grande to Falcon Lake, we'll have much bigger problems than just dead bass.

Richard said...

Arrrrgh, matey. I believe you have to be on the high seas or selling time shares to earn the name of pirate. These guys are just nacos with a bass boat and guns... squaring off against Texans, aka bubbas with a bass boat and guns.