Saturday, December 25, 2010

Sábado Gigante

* A Christmas morning tale of good cheer: After exchanging gifts here in the office this morning, we gathered up all the wrapping paper and bows and stuffed them into the ugly plastic trash can the city of Querétaro recently attached to the historic landmarked facade of our building. Less then an hour later, we stepped outside with the perro and discovered that someone had taken the time to reach in and steal it all - for what purpose, we can't even begin to imagine. God bless us all, everyone.

* As you can see in the photo, we have the choice of spending Christmas Day either at a bullfight or a 12-man steel cage lucha libre. What would baby Jesus do?

* Dept. of We Don't Ask You For Much: Seriously, none of you can explain this to us?

* India delivered Mexico a Christmas morning slap in the face by stealing the World Record for Most Chess Games Played Simultaneously. We're retaliating with a boycott of our local Hindu restaurant.

* La Familia Michoacana's Christmas card is beyond lame.

* The crazies take a post-DREAM-Act victory lap, reminding us all that the true meaning of Christmas is depriving children of a chance to go to college.

* Querétaro's returning wetback community gets a police escort from the border to the Sierra. They're probably on their own for the return trip, though.

* If you need a last-minute gift, you can download this Spanish-Hñähñu Dictionary for free.

* Some cool old snapshots of Mexico here and here, via The Mexile.

* Turns out the Acteal Massacre was just an accident. Problem solved!

* A great interactive map of the last 13 years of crime in Mexico. Querétaro is almost embarrassingly safe. We're not sure why we bother locking the doors at night.

* Last summer, Mexico busted the American Barbie. Now, it's payback time.

* Failed State of Arizona holiday roundup: Surprisingly, the state's Death Panels have been relying on erroneous information; FSoAZ resident Rebecca Parrett insists she was only coming to Mexico to die, apparently unaware of the beheading epidemic right at home; But in spite of all its problems, the state continues to attract the best and the brightest.

* So, we were wrong - Puebla is in fact insanely dangerous. The Pemex explosion was apparently visible from space.

* San Diego sounds like a dangerous, gun-crazy place. Must be because it has a Spanish name.

* Is there any situation so bad that Germany can't make it worse?

* Thank God climate change is a myth (as evidenced by the fact that it's snowing in Europe), otherwise Mexico would be fucked.

* A review of Viva Mexico! by Charles Macomb Flandrau, 1908. We'd heard good things about it, but have yet to find a copy.

* Courtesy of a commenter, we learn that Tijuana's basketball team is called the Zonkeys, though we have no idea why. The halftime show must be something to see.

* Miss Universe - from adorable to absolutely cringe-worthy in just four short months. Just pose for Playboy and get it over with!

* Speaking of cringe-worthy video... Happy Holidays from Burro Hall Enterprises, S.A.


Lovely Guadalupe said...

And speaking of failed states.......Bristol can probalby buy a cheap house in Guadalupe. We will have to wait and see if Erika Gándara eventually re-appears with a nice haircut, like other recent kidnapping victims.

"The only police officer remaining in a string of border towns in the Juárez Valley has been kidnapped, Chihuahua state officials said Saturday.

Gunmen stormed into the home of Erika Gándara about 6 a.m. Thursday in the town of Guadalupe and abducted her, said Carlos González, a spokesman for the Chihuahua attorney general."

Burro Hall said...

Or she could stay home and be slaughtered along with her baby in home-invasion robbery.

C.M. Mayo said...

zonkey... I think that would be a burro painted to look like a zebra... famous in Tijuana... tourists love them. You pay to get your photo taken with the animal hitched up to a colorful cart.