Wednesday, January 19, 2011

I Dig a Pony

Today's big news here the latest success in Mexico's failed "kingpin" strategy: the arrest of Jose Jorge "El JJ" Balderas, a cartel big shot who is also accused of having shot a famous Paraguayan soccer star whose name we would certainly recall if we actually followed soccer, but we remember it was kind of a big deal.


El JJ [above] "also is accused of having ties to Edgar Valdez 'La Barbie' Villarreal [below], an alleged U.S.-born drug kingpin arrested last year." This is obvious, because they were both arrested wearing the official Beltrán-Leyva cartel "Big Pony custom-fit polo shirt by Ralph Lauren" uniform.


With #3 and #2 now in custody, #1 might want to consider switching to Tommy Hilfiger.

Also arrested yesterday was El JJ's girlfriend, Colombian model/beauty queen Juliana Sossa Toro. The cool thing about being a drug lord is you get to have as your girlfriend a Colombian model/beauty queen. The bad thing is that Colombian models/beauty queens tend to be just dumb enough to put their home address on their Facebook pages.


Don't bother trying to friend her. We already did, and were told, "Sorry, this user already has too many friend requests." Literally thousands of people looked at that picture and said, "sure, her boyfriend is a ruthless killer, but I still think she'll dig me."

4 comments:

Dave said...

I was just noticing the bit of tongue showing on El JJ, and as the father of a sometimes sassy 8 year old, wonder if there's a bit of intent there, or if he's just mimicking a certain blogger's perro?

I'm curious exactly how one pronounces "JJ." Rolls off the tongue in English, but "hota hota" just sounds awkward to my ears.

Anonymous said...

J.J. girl has some BIG hooters, hoody hoo !!!!

I will become her friend !!!

graciela said...

Really? I was just thinking that with a cartel boyfriend, she´d be able to afford a less-horrible boob job. They´re tacky stripper awful!

Anonymous said...

The surgeon was likely under a bit of pressure.