Thursday, December 01, 2011

Absolut Fire Sale

The nutty nativists at Americans for [sic] Legal Immigration have just sent out an urgent bulletin:

We are sorry to report that for the first time in our organization's history, we have failed to reach our minimum operational expenses for our final funds drive of 2011. All things being equal, this would put us on a final shutdown date of January 1, 2011

Of course, the infallible wisdom of P.T. Barnum assures us that enough yahoos will break out their checkbooks, as they always do. But just in case, ALIPAC is selling off a couple of its prime assets: "We will also be auctioning off most, if not all, of our secondary websites."

Yes, LouDobbsForPresident.org is finally for sale! It's the perfect gift for, um... Mrs. Lou Dobbs, maybe?





(Potential purchasers should keep in mind  that ALIPAC actually withdrew their support for Dobbs after he said something almost rational about immigration - Lou fucking Dobbs is too Mexiphiliac for these people - so anyone mounting a serious "Lou Dobbs for President" effort will have to do so without the support of his obvious constituency. Shall we start the bidding at 100 Ameros?)

Also on the block is BoycottAbsolut.com, their hysterical (in both senses) reaction to an "unAmerican" advertisement run in a Mexican magazine by the French-owned conglomerate that markets the Swedish beverage.

In an Absolut World, amateurish Photoshopping will reign supreme.


That effort managed to inspire a tongue-in-cheek press release from a rival vodka distiller, which was enough for ALIPAC to declare victory.

Whaddaya say, Laura Martinez - shall we all chip in and buy that one?

Update:  Laura's in.  And she's actually serious.  So pony up, ya cheap bastards.  It's for a good cause: mockery.
Update II: The antireconquistadores at ALIPAC have updated their own bulletin:

"We will do our best to sell these to fellow patriots on our side of the issue, but there is a chance these domains will fall into the hands of marketers or illegal alien invasion supporters who might bid on them."

It takes some big balls to call us "marketers."

9 comments:

Dave said...

"Illegal alien invasion supporters" must be lining up at this moment.

The commentary on Lara's Absolut posting is mind-boggling. A stupid ad, for cripes sake. No wonder we can't fix our immigration issues.

Burro Hall said...

That comment thread needs to be preserved in a time capsule to be opened in the year 2108. Let people know what 2008 was like.

Anonymous said...

http://www.laaficion.com/node/91580

Maggie said...

TAKE MY NAME OFF OF THIS BLOG. GOSH WHY DON'T YOU TELL EVERYONE ABOUT YOUR FRIEND FULANO AKA LINTON ROBINSON your friend WHO RUNS TRAVEL AND TOURIST BOARDS AND BAJA.COM WHERE HE RAKES IN THE MONEY FROM ADVERTISEMENTS??

FUCK YOU

The best one of course, was the fulano files where he just aggravated the hatred and it is he who should be blamed for the Gifford's shooting where six fuckin other people died.

He's as bad as Stormfront and I am glad I turned his ass into the FBI - for hate material.

and you are just as bad you cocksucker for going along with it.

FUCK YOU

fuckin lowlife scumbag creep

sick fuck

What? you and Fulano think you are untouchable?

Well fuck you

Maggie said...

TAKE MY NAME OFF OF THIS BLOG. GOSH WHY DON'T YOU TELL EVERYONE ABOUT YOUR FRIEND FULANO AKA LINTON ROBINSON your friend WHO RUNS TRAVEL AND TOURIST BOARDS AND BAJA.COM WHERE HE RAKES IN THE MONEY FROM ADVERTISEMENTS??

FUCK YOU

The best one of course, was the fulano files where he just aggravated the hatred and it is he who should be blamed for the Gifford's shooting where six fuckin other people died.

He's as bad as Stormfront and I am glad I turned his ass into the FBI - for hate material.

and you are just as bad you cocksucker for going along with it.

FUCK YOU

fuckin lowlife scumbag creep

sick fuck

What? you and Fulano think you are untouchable?

Well fuck you

Laura Martinez said...

I've started the bidding process: Let the madness begin!


http://lauramartinez.wordpress.com/2011/12/02/will-you-help-me-and-burro-hall-raise-some-money-to-buy-boycottabsolute-com/

Anonymous said...

How much are you paying this angry Maggie character for the post-blog blog about your life as a homosexual, white supremacist real estate mogul? The batshit crazy rants are almost as entertaining as the blog itself.

Burro Hall said...

She pays me. It's all part of her therapy.

Maggie said...

I knew it would be an eventuality that you would fuck up. And you did, big time.

Another bullshit manipulation. Eat shit.

On this date which I was supposed to have made a comment (it was a much older comment made to you and you know it) and at the exact time guess what asshole -

I was having more skin cancer surgery. In San Diego.

And I have the records to prove it.

You just keep steppin on your dick there Fulan...oh sorry, Frank.

Well I'll make a copy of this one too.