Sunday, December 18, 2011

A Children's Treasury of Presidential Candidates Speaking Spanish

Mexico's next president, Enrique Peña Nieto, has gotten off to kind of a rocky start - actually, he's been proving himself the Baryshnikov of stomping on his own dick. But his latest embarrassment - the surfacing of a three-year-old video of himself attempting to speak a language we vaguely recognize as English, seems to us a blow landed slightly south of the waistline, if only because we're pretty sure this is exactly what we sound like in Spanish:



So we figured we'd be clever and try to dig up some old video of candidate Obama pandering to the Latino vote with a fractured attempt at Espanglish - but, damn! When this guy isn't busy killing Osama bin Laden, he's obviously working on his pronunciation:



Of course, you can always count on his predecessor:



But so what about the current crop of presidential guanabees? We've brought this video current frontrunner Newt Gingrich going all Torquemada on lengua materna before:



On the other hand, the only thing we could find on his rival Willard Romney is this ad recorded by his son, which leads us to assume the Mittster himself no habla the espanyol - all the more shocking because, of everyone in the field, he's the one with Mexican roots.



Searches for Clinton, Bush Sr. and a few of their predecessors came up empty, though we definitely recall seeing Jimmy Carter speaking Mexican on a few occasions. A few months ago Mike Bloomberg, the CEO of New York City and probably the politician Peña Nieto most resembles, did this to himself, to the delight of late-night comedians everywhere:



Finally, here's Jackie Kennedy, proving there's nothing she can't do with grace and elegance...



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