Wednesday, May 16, 2012

Sex And The City

When you think about it, Querétaro is a hard place to be a journalist.  Official corruption seldom rises above garden-variety; the Drug War action is elsewhere; celebrities (even Mexican ones) don't frolic here.  We don't even get interesting weather like hurricanes, or geological events like earthquakes or volcanoes.

So when a reporter gets a hot tip that a bunch of consenting adults are enjoying some perfectly legal but not quite Jesus-approved sexy-sexytime somewhere within an hour's drive of the city, you run with it - hard!

[I]n recent years, a stream of young married couples are changing the habits and customs of society Querétaro... They're called swingers, a term that refers to the trading of partners.  Their meetings are held on weekend nights to avoid having their secret discovered by family and friends, who would consider them "depraved."
The writer, Andy Novell, who has apparently never left his home or been exposed to books or movies written in the last 50 years, suddenly turns into Margaret Mead, marveling at the strange rites of the Samoans:
Those who attend the meetings considered themselves open-minded and tolerant, willing to discuss and enjoy in all aspects of daily life and sex.  Their habits are respected within the community for their diversity: some have a taste for group sex, watching sex (voyeurism) and being seen having sex (exhibitionism). According to sexologists, the degree of participation can classify couples as "soft swinging" (kissing, fondling and oral sex with a third or fourth person) or "full swap" or "complete exchange" (implies intercourse).
To review: every now and then, in a city of nearly a million people, a bunch of folks get together and enjoy themselves, sometimes by fucking.  This isn't just a front-page story... it's an investigation!
Plaze de Armas entered the private ClubAmigosSW, one of the most exclusive of Queretaro, located in the Tejeda colony of Corregidor. Contact was made through page to request an appointment in order to carry out the reportage.

It is a fact that these communities have blogs ( that serve as filters to weed out those who are genuine couples from those who seek to improperly take advantage.
[The link is moderately NSFW, depending where you work, and contains a great many photos of bottom-heavy women in "naughty schoolgirl" costumes. Readers expecting an Eyes Wide Shut-style sex mansion will be disappointed.]

Anyway, we know you think we're just piling on because our favorite crappy local paper ran a breathless headline over a silly story, but this really is one of the biggest stories of the year here.  Since this ran on Sunday, the mayor of Corregidora issued a blanket denial that there was any sexy-sexytime happening on his watch:

"We have no information about this. It's totally false. [Note: See also] We've had no complaints about this."
The mayor promised an investigation, and asked citizens to rat out any neighbors they suspect may be engaging in sexy-sexytime.

For a separate follow-up, Carlos Praxedis Ramírez Olvera,  the head of the politcal and social sciences department at the Autonomous University of Querétaro, intoned gravely that the existence of swingers (always italicized, as it's a foreign word describing a concept that simply doesn't exist in Mexican, much in the way the Tuareg people of the Sahara Desert have no native word for snow) in Querétaro means that "just as the traditional family model has undergone changes, so to are inter-couple relations being transformed."

And then today for a fourth front-page follow-up  - well, we'll just pass the mic to Diocese of Querétaro spokespriest Fr. Saúl Ragoitia:
"These situations are a reflection of the moral decay we are experiencing, as we have fallen into pessimism, forgetting values ​​such as marriage, family and love"..."We can not judge those who engage in these practices, since the Church is a mother and welcomes all men and women of good will and calls them to conversion and turning his eyes to God, his faith, and that is the call to all who have committed these acts, a call to conversion."

Or, as the sexy-sexytime heathens at the center of this - is 'scandal' really the right word? - put it:

As various presidential candidates; Sandra Calzada; Chapo Guzmán; and His Holiness Pope Benedict XVI issue statements on this story, Burro Hall will bring them to you. Usually within a couple of days.


Dave said...

I was just scrolling through the post when the last photo hit me....ouch! Guess I was warned, but still, did you have to?? I think my retinas are scarred.

They have to italicize "swingers" to avoid having it pronounced "sweenghers." Sort of like the pay/pie thing....

I just can't wait for the follow-ups...

Crazy Rita said...

Party at Burro Hall. Be there or be square.

Anonymous said...

Apparently your eyes were so glued to the photos in the story, you missed the "Related Stories" tag at the end about one of the PRI candidates, Roberto Loyola Vera.

My question is: "How is this tag story related?" Curious minds want to know - get out there and dig!

Burro Hall said...

Unsatisfied readers can apply in person for a full refund at our Guadalajara office every Wednesday afternoon between noon and 2pm. Two forms of ID are required.