Friday, July 20, 2012

The Envoy

If you've been barely sentient over the past six years or so, then you know Mexico has something of a p.r. problem.  It's dangerous.  It's violent.  It's a den of regulatory and financial corruption.  It's a haven for sociopaths who will beat you, or rape you, or worse. 

Given the importance of tourism to the Mexican economy, and the importance of image to the tourism industry, it's important to convince the world that this is not exactly true.  And who better to deliver that message than a violent, sociopathic, convicted rapist who made hundreds of millions of dollars beating people unconscious under the auspices of the most corrupt professional athletic governing body since they closed the Coliseum?

Ex-heavyweight champion Mike Tyson got attention from the press last week by participating in a promotional tourism campaign for Mexican resort cities Acapulco, Ixtapa, Cancún, Mazatlán and Puerto Vallarta.

“Throughout my career they have always treated me with dignity and respect”, said the ex heavy weight champion, as he wore a gray suite, white shirt and championship belt during the campaign launch in Mexico City. Tyson, who was named “head ambassador of the “Mexico ¡Se Siente!” campaign” took the time to thank his Mexican fans for their support throughout his career.

"Come for the beaches.  Stay for the coma-inducing beatdown!" Presumably, all the Mexican Tourist Board's other choices had already been executed.

Seriously, how inept is this country at self-promotion?  Our idiomatic Spanish has always been a bit weak,  so we had to look up "Se Siente," which basically means "feel yourself," but which we assume is used in the less-onanistic sense of "feel like yourself."  We're still not sure about that, but we discovered that, at least in Spain (and, remember, this is a Spanish-language campaign), it means "sucks to be you!" which, as slogans go, is decidedly uninspiring.  (Coincidentally, it's exactly what Tyson said to Evander Holyfield when he was doing his part to boost Las Vegas tourism 15 years ago.)

If we'd started this post by saying, "Mike Tyson is the newest ambassador for the 'Mexico: It Sucks Be You!' campaign," you'd have marveled at our wild comic creativity.  This blog literally writes itself sometimes.


Charles Pergiel said...

I came across a post where the writer claimed "48% or Americans are offended by the Peace symbol". I thought WTF? Why would they be offended by the Peace symbol? Eventually I realized that these are the same people who thought America could have won the Vietnam war. They may not be 48% of the population, but I suspect they are still a sizable contingent. I suspect the same thing is going on here with Tyson.

Don Alberto Doyle said...

A better ad campaign:

"Mexico: It’s where Salma Hayek’s from."

Below a swooning cleavage shot. (I tried to paste one, but evidently it's not feasible).

Boom, we're done, flight bookings to PV and Cancun triple in the ad's first month.

The snarky one said...

PV? Um, that's best known for another cohort of tourists not likely to be charmed by Ms. Hayek's cleavage:

Crazy Rita said...

I can barely understand English let alone idiomatic Spanish. I wish you supplied a glossary in your blog for words like sentient and onanistic so I could be lazy and not bother looking them up in a dictionary. Oh, me siente.