Thursday, July 04, 2013

Miss Bala 2013

One of our favorite odd local customs is the way Mexican colleges, though wide open to women, still have annual beauty pageants. This is Karla Contreras, Miss Autonomous University of Sinaloa School of Accounting and Administration 2012. Her talent was apparently injecting dangerous amounts of silicone into her gluteus.

Another local custom, especially in Sinaloa, is insane drug violence, which is how the 19-year-old Señorita Contreras came to be shot 14 times in Culiacán on Sunday, behind the wheel of the Cadillac Escalade pictured above, partially obscured by her award-winning, amazingly un-Photoshopped ass.

We know what you're thinking.  Come on, don't tell me that ass isn't Photoshopped. We had the same reaction, and while we're sure more photos will emerge in the coming days (which we of course promise to post here!), we think the photo at right should lay to rest any rumors of digital enhancement on our part, or of good taste on hers.

The other thing regular readers of this site are probably thinking is, what the fuck is up with being a Sinaloan beauty queen?

Right?  It seems like just last November that we all fell in love with Maria Susana Flores Gamez, not just because she was 2012's Miss Woman of Sinaloa, but because she died in "an hours-long running gun battle" with the army. And Laura Elena Zuñiga, Miss Sinaloa 2008, who was "arrested along with seven men while carrying arms and thousands of dollars in cash." She eventually walked due to lack of evidence [read: bribes and/or blowjobs]. And of course, who could forget Emma Coronel, winner of the somewhat-less-than-prestigious Miss Coffee and Guyaba Fair 2007, who somehow managed to parlay that meager title into becoming Mrs Chapo Guzmán, which is really about as "Miss Sinaloa" as you can get.

Predictably, in the 20 minutes since we started writing this post, yet another photo has surfaced.  The Contreras balcony was apparently as overstuffed as the basement.  It's surprising this kind of padding doesn't offer protection against .38 caliber bullets.


viajero said...

What a waist!

Burro Hall said...